I am a witness to
two types of desperation.
One-
the desperation of backing away.
The other-
desperation of desperately wanting.

I decree them equal.
I am a split witness.

I recently found myself
listening to a short story
about a dead pet turtle.
Small and green,
it escaped its aquarium
and wandered a desert
of shag carpet
equally green
the sort of synthetic wasteland
a small green turtle gets lost in.

It was found three days later,
shriveled in the position of trying
to crawl under the door.

Tragically funny and magically sad

decreed equal

I have mistaken peace for happiness,
easily done
without a sharp sadistic sadness
to provide adequate contrast.
A wash of warmth
disintegrating palate
Happiness misses its enemy.
Oh, they write...
but the distance becomes...
(spoken with a sharp turn of the head and demure sorrow)
"...too much."

and another thing:
Religion has infinite possibilities.
Last night I promised to pray for a dead man.
I have not yet succeeded, however,
I believe I am intimidated by the endless infinite.
Perhaps I am speaking to nothing.
No.
I know better.

Perhaps I am speaking to everything at once.
The podium of the gallows.

I am a witness to the fact that
others share my aversion.
In fact, most
prefer
when possibilities are not
infinite.

Examples:
Television.
Video Games.
Money.
Mazes.
Land.
War.
Law.
Hippies.
Gadgets.
Sex.
The Equal Sign.
Aquariums.
Dead Turtles.
Examples.

In fact,
if someone were to create
as God once did,
a world containing all these things,
I believe it would rapidly become
the best sort of life to have
especially if there was the sense
of being watched,
a happy desperation
and infinite peace
and all things were equal
within these bits of maze to move in.